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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Juicy Revision

Image found here
When my husband and I tried our new juicer this past weekend, we had some adventures. Pulp started spraying everywhere--on us, the counter, the floor. Turns out the pulp container wasn't secured properly. It is truly a pulp catcher, therefore be advised not to leave even the smallest of gaps between it and the machine or the vegetables will turn violent. Once that got fixed, our juice emerged without further incident.


Juicing is all the rage now because it gives us quick access to micronutrients. I'm turning to it because I recently saw the documentary FAT, SICK, AND NEARLY DEAD and felt compelled to improve my diet. My excuse for eating too much processed food is that I have a busy job, almost 90 minutes of commuting per day, and a writer's life stuffed into every nook and cranny. I've eaten more turkey sandwiches than I can count.

I've only so far tried one of the Mean Green recipes that Joe Cross recommends from his documentary, but I love it. I love the fresh sting of ginger, the sweetness of apple, and the bite of lemon. I love knowing I'm getting kale and carrot straight into my system. Last night we tried lime, lemon, celery, kale,  parsley, and green apple. Excellent.

Writers are forever cursed with seeing symbol, and pathetic fallacy or not, we get ideas from life and its objects constantly. That ol' living-to-write curse: our dramas and struggles grip the juicer, too, and get mirrored in the fruits and veggies. So of course you know where this is headed: how juicing = writing and pulp catcher = revision in that classic metaphor equation.

The pulp is that frothy, fuzzy, even fluffy mix of rind and pith and whatever the juicer sees fit to reject (who am I to question the wisdom of the Breville). It's no doubt healthy and even edible. But it must go. To get a consumable juice for our best drinking pleasure and dietary benefit, you need to let go of the pulp. My husband tried some last night, because it is kind of pretty, and he said, "You know what? It's bitter."

Obvious connection, right? Discard pulp just like you rid your draft of excess weight? But when that pulp started spraying and we feared for seconds we had a bum juicer, I was reminded how revision scares and singes like the devil. I was also reminded that we writers can step up with a clinical, mechanical eye and crush what's needed to squeeze out the essence. And that what glitters ain't always worth keeping in the manuscript.

Take my most recent revision of my novel. When I opened the manuscript sent back to me by my agent, Sarah Heller, with line edits, it looked like half of it was gone. Red lines through close to 80 pages told me that no matter how delicious or pretty, what I deemed sophisticated turns of phrase, incandescent imagery, and character-rich spates of dialogue did not advance the story.  "Nothing has happened by page 150," Sarah told me. "Young adults don't give a s*** about this scene, that bit, this part.."

I'm an abuser of the editorial comment. I must be contained, if not squeezed into silence. What was it I was preaching in 2008 about my art of editorializing?

So I opened a new Word doc titled "Excess" (I have one for every manuscript of a short story and as many of these as there are drafts of a novel) and dumped about 75 pages of pulp there.

Pulp includes those "telling" words and phrases--lines I deemed witty that only emphasized a point already made. Sarah showed me how I'd already shown things, that the reader gets it, and momentum slows when the supposed darlings stay. My eyes began to see where whole pages were fluff in the way of people getting the story.

Because this was round three for me with agent edits and draft 20-something since I began the novel in December 2009, I felt confident--more like machine than weak, defensive, and emotional writer. In this equation I have become the juicer and though I'm not as sleek or efficient as a Breville, I could juice out a draft worthy of a next read.

Some passages I couldn't part with and my head found a way to make them advance the story (we hope). If Sarah needs to cross through them a second time, then so be it. What is nutritious is in the eye of the agent and the market. YA wants under 75,000 words; YA wants page-turner; YA wants youth focus, not adult focus. My agent pared away the rind and leaves and stalks that I think make fruit oh so pretty.  Because of teen taste. Because we want to sell this thing.

I also find it interesting that the pulp container sometimes catches whole pieces of apple. Maybe because we didn't buy the Cadillac version out there; maybe because the juicer saw a bad part of apple. Who knows. The point is, I'm not going to be digesting that bit; the wilderness that is our yard will. And that's okay. My stomach is only so big; my eyes might want it all, but reality says, all things in moderation.

After each juicing, the pulp container is FULL. The juice emerges bright green, bright orange. Beautiful.  I drink it, and my evening cravings have disappeared. I'm eating less, yet, eating more.

Writing Prompts


  • Are you a writing machine or hopelessly human? Do you cling to your words or do you know how to toss them? Why do you think you cling so hard?
  • Find a juicy piece of writing. (Do not go to a first draft.) Recall how you juiced it. What was your secret?
  • Research your favorite writer and find out his or her secret for juicing.
  • If you struggle desperately with revision, try one or more of these exercises with a draft already in existence. 1) Write a paragraph of 100 words and then insist on it being 50. 2) Leave a draft for three days and return to it with a new name and hat on (for example, if you are a romance writer, you are now Romance Reader Rita who has 'tude and little time; you are Mystery Mike, or Young Adult Yancey, and you have no patience for excess. Read with an evil eye aiming to laser away excess and pitch the story at the first distraction. 3) Meet with an English teacher or a writer you respect, buy them a latte, and ask them to bring a red pen. Suck it up when they cross through more than half your draft.
  • Ask yourself these questions to see if you have the support (machine) you need to juice a revision out of your writing: Do you have a log line, a 25-word sentence to sum up your story, one that will highlight which parts of the story are excess? Do you have trustworthy readers who will draw lines through your work? Do you make time to read your work aloud? Do you have files labeled Excess or Beloved Darlings I'll Be With You Again Someday so you can relinquish lines? Do you set word limits that are market standard? Do you try to enter works in contests with word limits? 

3 comments:

Laura Maylene said...

Your post has encouraged me to juice something very soon. I have a Green Star juicer and just love it, but lately have been on more of a green smoothie kick. It's about time for a glass of juice. My favorite juice is spinach, chard, carrots, an apple, and a little bit of celery. Maybe a tiny slice of beet. I'm hungry (thirsty?) just thinking about it.

I usually compost the pulp, but sometimes I forget to stir it in and it gets kind of moldy. I wonder what this says about my writing....

Marcia Mount Shoop said...

Less is more. Loss is gain. Those are tough truths to trust in a culture of excess. Thank you for the healthy reminder! And remember that pulp out in your yard is fertilizing something, too. That file of edits is fertilizer from which more rich prose and poetry will emerge.

Lyn Fairchild Hawks said...

Laura, thanks for the recipe! As for moldy pulp, I'd say that speaks to your comfort with turning away from the discards. You don't pine for pulp and that's wise!

Marcia, the yard got a bonus tonight. There's a time, place, and purpose to all things!